7 Questions to Ask an EMDR Therapist Before You Begin

Maybe you understand exactly why you feel the way you do, but understanding hasn't changed how you react.

Maybe something happened years ago, and you know it's over, but your body doesn't seem to know it yet.

Maybe you've done talk therapy and gained a lot of insight, but there are certain memories, beliefs, fears, or reactions that still seem to have a hold on you.

Or maybe you wouldn't describe what happened to you as "trauma" at all. You simply know there are experiences from your past that continue to affect how you feel about yourself, your relationships, or the world around you.

These are some of the reasons people begin looking into EMDR therapy.

EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. It is a research-supported psychotherapy that helps people process distressing experiences that may continue to affect them in the present. EMDR has been used for more than 30 years and has been extensively studied in the treatment of PTSD, including with veterans and people who have experienced significant trauma.

But EMDR isn't necessarily limited to one catastrophic event. Sometimes people come to EMDR carrying the impact of experiences that accumulated over time: rejection, bullying, difficult family relationships, painful losses, relationship betrayal, feeling unsafe growing up, or years of believing they weren't good enough.

If you are looking for an EMDR therapist in Birmingham, AL, knowing what to ask can help you understand both the treatment and the therapist who will be walking through it with you.

Here are seven questions we think are worth asking.

1. What Is EMDR?

This may sound like an obvious question, but your therapist should be able to explain EMDR in a way that makes sense to you.

EMDR is different from traditional talk therapy. Rather than only talking through an experience and trying to understand it, EMDR helps you focus on aspects of a distressing experience while engaging in bilateral stimulation.

Bilateral stimulation alternately engages the left and right sides of the body. This may involve guided eye movements, alternating taps, or sounds.

During processing, you may notice memories, thoughts, emotions, beliefs, images, or sensations. Your therapist helps guide you through that process while paying attention to how you are responding.

The goal isn't to erase a memory.

Instead, EMDR is intended to help you process the experience so that it becomes less distressing and has less power over how you respond in the present.

A memory can still matter without continuing to feel like it is happening right now.

2. Why Does EMDR Work?

This is an interesting question because researchers continue to study exactly why EMDR works.

EMDR is based on the idea that some distressing experiences may not be fully processed and can remain connected to painful emotions, beliefs, physical sensations, and reactions.

You may logically know:

"I'm safe now."

while your body reacts as though you aren't.

Or:

"I know it wasn't my fault."

while emotionally you continue to carry shame.

EMDR is designed to help those experiences become more adaptively processed so that the past does not continue to trigger the same level of distress in the present.

Research strongly supports EMDR as a treatment for PTSD. Researchers have also studied the role of bilateral stimulation and working memory in reducing the vividness and emotional intensity of distressing memories.

We don't need to fully understand every neurological mechanism to know that EMDR has substantial research supporting its effectiveness for PTSD. At the same time, a good EMDR therapist should be careful not to make claims about the brain that go beyond what research has established.

3. How Long Does EMDR Take?

The answer you probably don't want to hear is:

It depends.

But there is an important reason for that.

EMDR is not simply a technique your therapist performs for a predetermined number of sessions. Treatment includes taking your history, developing a treatment plan, preparing and resourcing you, identifying experiences to work on, processing those experiences, and reevaluating your progress.

Someone working through a single distressing experience may have a very different treatment timeline from someone carrying years of complex trauma or multiple experiences that are connected to one another.

Your therapist brings clinical expertise to decisions about readiness, treatment planning, and pacing.

But you bring expertise too.

You are the expert on your experience.

If you need to slow down, say so. If you feel ready to continue, let your therapist know. If you need a break, you can take one.

EMDR should be collaborative. Your therapist provides leadership and clinical guidance, while you have a voice in how you experience the pace of the work.

Rather than asking a therapist to promise that EMDR will take a certain number of sessions, you might ask:

"Based on what you know about me so far, what do you anticipate treatment might look like, and how will we know whether we're making progress?"

4. What Is the Difference Between an EMDR Trained Therapist and an EMDR Certified Therapist?

This is an important distinction, and the terminology can be confusing.

An EMDR trained therapist has completed an EMDR training program that teaches clinicians how to use the EMDR model. EMDRIA-approved basic training includes instruction, supervised practice, and consultation requirements.

EMDRIA Certification is an additional credential therapists can pursue after completing EMDR training. Certification requires additional experience using EMDR with clients, consultation with an approved consultant, continuing education in EMDR, and other professional requirements.

So which one should you choose?

Certification can demonstrate that a therapist has pursued additional experience and education in EMDR, but certification should not be the only thing you consider.

Ask:

How frequently do you use EMDR?

What types of concerns do you typically use it with?

Do you participate in ongoing consultation or continuing education?

How do you decide when someone is ready to begin processing?

And perhaps most importantly:

Do I feel comfortable with this therapist?

Credentials matter. Experience matters. And the relationship you have with the person sitting across from you matters too.

5. How Can I Get the Most Out of EMDR Therapy?

One of the most important things you can do happens before any bilateral stimulation begins:

Find a therapist you feel comfortable with and can trust.

Decades of psychotherapy research consistently find that the quality of the therapeutic relationship is associated with treatment outcomes across different types of therapy.

That doesn't mean your therapist has to become your best friend or that therapy should always feel comfortable. It means you should feel that your therapist listens to you, takes you seriously, respects your boundaries, and is someone you can be honest with when something isn't working for you.

There are several other things you can do to get more from EMDR:

Be honest about what you are experiencing rather than trying to give the "right" answer.

Tell your therapist when you need to slow down.

Practice the regulation and grounding strategies you develop together.

Notice what comes up between sessions.

Ask questions when you don't understand something.

Try not to judge what comes into your mind during processing.

And give yourself some space after more emotionally demanding sessions when possible.

You don't have to be "good at EMDR."

Your job is to notice, communicate, and participate honestly in the process.

6. What Can EMDR Offer That Talk Therapy May Not?

Talk therapy can be incredibly valuable.

Talking can help us understand our experiences, identify patterns, develop insight, change behaviors, improve relationships, and make sense of our lives.

But sometimes knowing isn't the same thing as feeling differently.

You may have spent years understanding why you react the way you do.

You know your current partner isn't the person who hurt you.

You know the accident is over.

You know you couldn't have prevented what happened.

You know you aren't that frightened child anymore.

And yet your body, emotions, or automatic reactions don't seem to have gotten the message.

That is often where people become interested in EMDR.

Rather than relying primarily on discussing and analyzing an experience, EMDR gives you another way of working with distressing memories, beliefs, emotions, and physical sensations connected to it.

This doesn't mean EMDR is "better" than talk therapy. And it doesn't mean talking isn't part of EMDR treatment.

It means EMDR gives your therapist another way to help you work with experiences that insight alone may not have changed.

7. How Do I Know if EMDR Might Be Right for Me?

You don't need to diagnose yourself before calling an EMDR therapist.

But you may recognize yourself in statements like these:

"I understand why I do this, but I can't seem to stop reacting this way."

"I know what happened is over, but it doesn't feel over."

"I've talked about this before, but I still feel stuck."

"Something relatively small happens now, and I have a reaction that feels much bigger than the situation."

"I know I'm safe, but my body doesn't seem to believe me."

"I know it wasn't my fault, but part of me still feels like it was."

"There are things from childhood that still affect how I see myself."

"Certain memories still bring up strong emotions or physical reactions."

"I avoid certain places, situations, conversations, or experiences because of what happened."

"I want to move forward, but something keeps pulling me back."

None of these automatically means that EMDR is the right treatment for you.

They are reasons it may be worth having a conversation with an EMDR therapist.

A trained clinician can learn more about what you're experiencing, discuss your goals, and help determine whether EMDR should be part of your treatment.

Finding an EMDR Therapist in Birmingham, AL

Choosing an EMDR therapist isn't only about finding someone who knows how to perform a technique.

You are looking for someone who understands the EMDR process, knows how to prepare you for the work, can recognize when to move forward and when to slow down, and creates a relationship in which you feel safe enough to be honest about what you are experiencing.

Ask questions.

Pay attention to how the therapist answers them.

And pay attention to how you feel sitting across from that person.

At Sparrow Counseling, we offer EMDR therapy in Birmingham, AL, for adults and preteen/teens who may be carrying experiences from the past that continue to affect their lives today.

If you've found yourself thinking, "I know it's over, but it doesn't feel over," EMDR may be worth exploring.

Ready to Find Out if EMDR Might Be a Good Fit for You?

If you’ve found yourself thinking, “I know it’s over, but it doesn’t feel over,” EMDR may be worth exploring.

Ready to take the next step?

1. Learn more about our EMDR therapy services and how EMDR can help you process experiences that continue to affect you today.

2. Meet our EMDR therapists and find someone who feels like a good fit for you.

3. Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to ask questions, learn more about EMDR therapy in Birmingham, AL, and decide whether you’re ready to get started.

Other Services Offered at Sparrow Counseling

At Sparrow Counseling, we offer in-person and online therapy in the state of Alabama. In addition to EMDR therapy, our team specializes in teen & pre-teen counseling, family therapy, co-parenting counseling, couples counseling, couples retreats, premarital counseling and pre-engagement counseling, discernment counseling, and more in Birmingham, Alabama. Learn more by checking out our FAQs and Blog!

Sparrow Counseling is a Birmingham-area counseling practice offering EMDR therapy to help individuals process experiences that continue to affect how they feel, think, and respond in the present. Our EMDR-trained clinicians provide compassionate, evidence-based care for clients navigating trauma, anxiety, grief, difficult life experiences, and patterns that can leave them feeling stuck. Through EMDR therapy, we help clients process what happened so the past can begin to feel like the past.